Monday, September 14, 2009

Nothing To Do With Anything

But really, really funny:

Cracked.com reviews the Twilight series.

If I could write snark, I would aspire to lines like this:
Three hundred pages after "Oh, you like me too? No way, I thought you hated me!", the plot arrives late to the party, drunk, in a beat-up '53 Chevy pick-up truck. It drives away about fifty pages later and crashes into a tree, gets sent to the hospital, and is rarely heard from again throughout the course of the series.


Thanks to Jackie for passing it along!

Cracked.com does have its moments of genius. As an ACTUAL MEMBER of the Class of 1984, this line elicited a howl of pelvis-deep laughter, flavored with a hint uncomfortable recognition:

On any given night in 1984, one could find a few women on a girl's night out, blockaded behind a wall of hair and empty bottles of Bartles & Jaymes, drunkenly belting out "We are strong!" while adjusting their fluorescent ankle-warmers
in its description of Pat Benatar's Love is a Battlefield, from the article The 10 Most Terrifyingly Inspirational '80s Songs.

In conclusion, if you're looking for a way to kill some internet time, Cracked.com ain't a bad way to do it.

6 comments:

FictionGroupie said...

That Twilight link is hilarious. Thanks for that. It had me laughing out loud.

Jackie (Literary Escapism) said...

Wasn't this fab? I loved the vampire turf wars. There were moments it even had my husband laughing.

Carolyn Crane said...

Okay, that is really hilarious! I need to check out that site more.

Shannon said...

Oooh, I love the snark. Gotts check out the site more thoroughly.

Darren Daz Cox said...

:) hehe

Phyl said...

Oh my gosh! The very mention of Bartles & James -- ah, the memories!

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